wow. tomorrow.

i cannot believe i am headed to staging tomorrow. it seems so unreal still. i thought that at this point i would be terrified or nervous beyond belief, but i feel peaceful. i am excited about getting started with my work in kazakhstan. surprisingly the only thing i am actually nervous about is russian. i'm feeling slightly inept at foreign languages. sign language was just soooo much easier!

i spent last night repacking my bags (thanks to lindsay, andrew, and pops for performing miracles and getting it to all fit) for the third time. my dad and i got it right the first time, but when i went to put the backpack duffle on i couldn't lift it. like at all. & then once i got it on i had to practically bend over and touch my toes to keep from falling over. (it was also 54 pounds. oops). so pops and i went back to the samsonite store, i'm pretty sure they know me by name there now, and i got another rolling duffle. it was heavier than what i wanted, but a sacrifice i was willing to make to roll my junk. this bag weighed 7 pounds more than the other.

i brought it home and repacked with andrew. it was actually pretty painless, and i am glad that i did because my febreeze had exploded in its freezer bag and started to leak. i got it all packed and underweight so i was even able to add my uggs in. yay!this was all one week ago before i went to jersey to greet my new niece. i was so proud of myself (a famous procrastinator) for packing so far in advance.

thennn...i got an email from peace corps with packing suggestions. thanks PC, but a lil late. anywho they said to pack three days worth of stuff in my carry-on, which i did (go me!) and then to fill one bag with the things i will need during training and the other with stuff i won't need until i get to my permanent site. oops again. i totally didn't do that, i just squished wherever things fit. i'm pretty sure even my shoes were separated from their mates. soo my sister and andrew and i spent a loooong time last night unpacking and reorganizing. and then my dad had to come over and get my smaller duffle to fit everything and zip. it was a mess, but i totally think not having to get into the second bag and try to repack again before going to my permanent site will be soooo much easier.

so tips for future pcvs out there struggling to pack, pack one bag for training and the other with things you can live without. so much easier. & i have a packing list that i can email anyone packing in the future if they want it. i was gonna post it, but i don't really have room. =)

tomorrow i will be meeting in georgetown to register and then go through a day of orientation. i will stay the night at the hotel there and then take a bus to dulles airport with my fellow kazakhstan trainees. we will fly out to frankfurt at 5:50ish. then a six or seven hour layover and then flying to almaty. we should get in around 12:30 am. i will then go to sleep and wake-up bright and early for my first day of trainings. whew!

i'm not sure how my internet situation will be, but i'll keep everyone posted & my awesome sister will update periodically for me to let you all know what i'm up to.

&&& i've been meaning to post this forever. i am going to be part of an awesome project. 50 volunteers from 50 different countries will be filling two journals up with snapshots of their service. look at the blog for the details! i will be helping keep track of the second journal and updating the blog to let everyone know where the journal is in the world.

for those of you reading this on Peace Corps Journals, i will be switching over from Applicants to Kazakhstan so find me there!

Sorry for the lengthy post.
27 months til disney world,

i have awesome friends and family.

this past weekend was by far one of the best weekends everrr. my mom has apparently been scheming a surprise party for quite sometime. since she is not a good liar at all, i knew something was going on, but i never in a million years thought it would be this.

on friday night i was woken up at two in the morning. i had taken my contacts out and i am blind without them, no exaggeration. i was surrounded by a crowd of blobs. my initial reaction was that i was about to be robbed and tortured by gang members, but when the camera started flashing i was able to make out the figures. my friends from college were in my room in virginia! four of my best friends from college drove from tennessee to come see me before i left. i moved back home after graduating from school in tennessee so my opportunities to see my friends are few and far between. luckily my sister was available to play paparazzi and this was my reaction (excuse the 2am fashion and hair):


after getting all my friends settled in i assumed that this had been the surprise my mom had been trying so hard to keep from me. we all went to lunch the next day with my mom and dad and then the girls and i went shopping. after shopping my friends said we should stop at my mom's house to pick up the playstation so we could play american idol karaoke. never one to turn down an opportunity to belt it out, i wholeheartedly agreed. when i got to my mom's place i could not find parking anywhere, but since i am not the brightest bulb in the box, i didn't realize something else was going on until i saw the giant kazakhstan flag hanging from my parent's front porch. i could see my mom inside the window flashing pictures. (can't you just see her sneakiness). i walked inside to find a house full of friends and family:


unbelievable. once i got in the door i realized that my two best friends from home were sitting in the living room. one had flown all the way from colorado for 24 hours to see me (i still choke up at this) & the other drove down from philly. this was my lovely and most attractive reaction to seeing them:


we have been best friends since i was 2! it was at this point that i made a beeline for the kitchen to try and hold back the tears. (see what i mean? awesome friends and family). luckily my bf's dad was in the kitchen to help me pull it together. thank you mr. mazzella! (those of you who know me well know that i am no crier. my sister got mad at me for not even crying in my sister's keeper) i was then able to take in the awesome decorations, sunflowers and kazakhstan! (shout out to pops for finding kazakhstan flags galore, including pins for everyone to wear! & to mrs. hill for lending her beautiful russian dolls!) they really outdid themselves:



there was tons of delicious food. my parents printed out maps of kazakhstan and hung them around the room. they also printed my training address onto hot pink envelopes for everyone to take, along with a packet of sunflower seeds that encouraged prayers and love for me on my adventure! to top it off my mom had all my friends print out pictures of us together and put them together in a journal. everyone wrote me a little inspirational note inside the journal to cheer me up if i am feeling blue. simply fabulous. i also got loaded up with tons of goodies for kazakhstan. i am lucky to have so many great teachers in my life because i wouldn't even know where to being with school supplies. i now have a full collection complete with tips!


honestly one of the most emotional and enjoyable moments of my life.


these are my best friends from home. 21 years of friendship makes for incredible stories and beautiful memories. i am truly blessed.


these are my girlfriends from college. i am always stunned with how lucky i am to have the most amazing friends in the world. we had a great time catching up this weekend. from listening to brandis sing one karaoke song after another at a volume that no human should reach to taking "my last picture in america" in front of the staute of liberty at red robin it was a moment of relief and love that i needed amongst the stress of packing and goodbyes. we even took the opportunity to put up a stunt before we get too old. (holly watched and laughed saying no to being tossed in the air, much like college. =)


back to the harder stuff,

some things i will miss

obviously i am going to miss my friends and family most of all, but there are many other things that i am going to hate missing for 27 months. this post is dedicated to them. in no particular order:



taco bell. this will be a struggle.






my shows. <3 gossip girl, true blood, and grey's anatomy.





the final movies. no midnight showings for me this time.




my unhealthy addiction: dr. pepper.




cruising with the top down in my lovely car. mine is actually white, but you know.




i have a problem. i love to shop. & i will miss it. but taking a break will be good for me...and my pocketbook.




english. i will miss speaking english on a regular basis. i am excited about learning russian, but i know i will miss english.


enjoying the things i will miss while i can,

moving along

first of all, i got dental clearance. again! i generally dislike the dentist and this appointment was no better than any other. my dental hygienist told me i had a cavity to be filled before i could leave, and i was completely bummed. i thought this would put me way too far behind. turns out she just wasn't using the cavity finder thing correctly and the dentist cleared me for take-off. i mailed it in that day and had clearance two days later. my dental hygienist was awesome enough to give me enough toothbrushes and toothpaste to last me two years. so sweet.

i have been working hard to stay on top of the long list of to-dos i need to get done before i leave. i bought all my luggage (two samsonite duffles, one rolling 24"& one w/ backpack straps that looks identical), a north face solaris 35 to take as my carry on, and a purse that holds a laptop from target as my personal item. i made my packing list, and i am pretty close to having everything on it. i have all of my new goodies piling up on a chair in the corner of my room. i'll post the final list here when i finally finish updating it so anyone who wants to look at it in the future can.

i have also been working on my russian. i try to do an hour of rosetta stone a day. i have to be honest, not that sure rosetta stone is that awesome of an investment. i just don't think it really fits with my learning style. i figure some familiarity with the language is better than none though. & i have finally begun the process of packing up my room. i tried to go through my clothes and pack up anything i know i won't take to kazakhstan or won't wear before i leave. i clearly have an issue with shopping. it is safe to say that i am probably going to bring way more clothes than anything else. but they say bring what makes you happy or keeps you sane so...pish posh. weird to think that in 7 weeks i will be heading out.

let the countdown begin,

ridin the waves.

i have completely neglected this blog. now that the semester is winding down i figure i owe everyone an update.

first of all, getting an application status update after being invited=scary. that excited feeling no longer accompanies those 5 a.m. emails. my application status update let me know that i have a dental hold. apparently my dental clearance is only good until march 5th & i'm supposed to leave march 9th (actually the OMS letter said march 8th, but i'm trying not to get too hung up on the discrepancy). so now i am just waiting on obama's health reform to put me back on mommy and daddy's insurance. blue cross blue shield says that will be jan. 1. cutting it close? maybe, but i def. can't afford those dental x-rays on my part-time retail paycheck =)

in other news, i filled out & sent my visa application along with my passport. i never heard whether they got that or not. i probs should put that on my list of things to check on. i read everything included in that blue invitation kit & i also started learning russian. i'm pretty sure that's how the nightmares started. in the latest nightmare i landed in almaty alone with just my sister's kitten. i couldn't find my bags & i was wandering around in the freezing cold. there were people inside stores, but i couldn't go in & ask for directions because i had the cat. i was worried the whole time about mr. bingley (that's our cat) freezing his little white tail off. i finally found my bag, but it was almost completely empty. i went to tell the baggage claim people, but i didn't know how to say anything but cat in russian. [that is actually true. for some reason cat is the only word that is sticking with me. & apples. which is good because i am allergic to apples and kazakhstan is the birthplace of apples.]

so i think all the nightmares attributed to the fact that last week i woke up & couldn't help but think "what the heck are you doing?" i spent the entire week trying to put my finger on what it was that had originally drawn me to PC. i applied for PC when i was in my last semester of college. the plan had been to go after graduation, get back by the time i was 23 & then start doing more grown-up things. i am now 23. my application was put on hold, and then i withdrew it for the master's international program, & now i am 23 and leaving for PC. & when i get back i will be 26 and doing all sorts of 21-23 year old things. one of the major changes for me was coming home and falling in love all over again with my ex-bf. and now i am leaving him for 27 months when i know that if i stayed i would be getting married in the next 27 months instead. that's a big thing that i have admitted to very few people.

so i was feeling very blue about the whole PC thing. i know for a fact that celebrating thanksgiving and realizing it would be last with family for a while played a direct role in my second-guessing. i read & re-read my favorite PC blogs. normally they get me excited, but for some reason it wasn't working. so i decided to go shopping. shopping is my cure-all. i was rummagging through the jewelry at the thrift store while my sister was checking out when i saw this keychain:



anyone who knows me knows that i love all things pink, artsy, & with a hippy flare. i immediately grabbed it & hurried to give it to my sister before she finished checking out. you will never believe what was on the back:



that's right. that there is the kazakhstan flag with kazakhstan written above it. almost instantly i felt like sobbing and laughing. & i have been back on the PC bandwagon since. for those of you that are now questioning my sanity or desire to actually go overseas: 27 months is a loooong time. kazakhstan is coooooold. and the insane thing would be not to think seriously about this decision before i leave my loved ones behind.

on that note... enjoying the high,

i aspire.

here is my aspiration statement. given the 7-10 day deadline along with a million other things to get done, don't judge too harshly on the grammar/writing. feel free to use this as an example. hopefully it helps explain some of my reasoning behind joining the peace corps & the reasons i believe i will be successful in kazakhstan.

The professional attributes you plan to use, and what aspirations you hope to fulfill, during your Peace Corps service.

I aim to use my education and personal experiences with the United States Education system during my Peace Corps Service in Kazakhstan. My extensive education in the field of Curriculum and Instruction, particularly pertaining to English Language Learners will prove to be very useful in my role as a secondary teacher trainer. My experiences observing seasoned English teachers, utilizing best practices in teaching English to adult immigrants, and substituting in the public school system have given me ample opportunity to put my educational foundation into concrete experiences. This experience with educational theory and interactive teaching strategies will be beneficial in training teachers in Kazakhstan new methods of teaching that engage critical thinking skills and move away from rote memorization. I also aim to use my experience in public speaking, non-profit fundraising, and customer service to work respectfully and effectively within my community.
I aspire to learn a great deal more about the educational system in Kazakhstan and the goals for that educational system. I also hope to use the professional skills I possess in order to be more effective in my position as a secondary teacher trainer. I am excited to learn more about the details of the Peace Corps and working within a U.S. government organization. I aspire to be an outstanding Peace Corps Volunteer that will reflect my country and Peace Corps well.

The strategies for working effectively with host country partners to meet expressed needs.

In order to work effectively with host country partners to meet expressed needs, it is key to remain open-minded, patient, and respectful. During my service I intend to spend time getting to know my host country partners and allowing them ample time to express their needs and concerns. This involves listening carefully to gain a full understanding of their goals and the resulting implications, as well as asking questions in order to clarify and gain as clear a picture as possible. It is my hope that by listening carefully to the needs of my host country partners that I may be able to work with them to develop solutions together. Using skills and strategies learned during Peace Corps Training I aim to make myself available to my host country partners and work with them to address the concerns they have with sustainable goals and solutions.

Your strategies for adapting to a new culture with respect to your own cultural background.

I am always excited to learn about new cultures. My travels in Africa, as well as my teaching experience with English as a Second Language learners have give me an opportunity to learn a great deal about cultures that I wouldn’t have encountered otherwise. Each experience with a new culture seems to change and broaden my view of the world. Every student I have discussed culture with always expresses their desire to learn as much as they can about the American culture, while still retaining their personal identity that is composed of varying values, traditions, and cultural influences. It has always been a goal in my classroom to be open and tolerant of differing views, as well as kind and understanding toward any individual no matter how different. This is a concept that can be adapted to my travels in Kazakhstan. I will strive to remain open-minded and tolerant, as well as kind and understanding. I want to learn as much about the culture of Kazakhstan while still retaining my personal values, traditions and cultural influences. I know that my personal identity will shift and grow while I am in Kazakhstan. I also recognize that with my constant journal writing, letters and e-mails to friends and family, talking with fellow Peace Corps Volunteers, and sharing with my new host country friends, I will be able to maintain a strong sense of self and my own cultural background with a broadened worldview.

The skills and knowledge you hope to gain during pre-service training to best serve your future community and project.

During pre-service training I hope to progress in the language of Kazakh or Russian as much as possible. I hope that with the instruction Peace Corps will provide and my hard work and developed study skills I will do well in the language and therefore more effectively communicate within my community and while working at my site. I also hope to learn a great deal about the educational system in Kazakhstan and the goals for English language learning. I would like to speak with current teachers and hear about their current strategies and concerns in the classroom.
I hope to gain a better understanding of life and culture within Kazakhstan. I anticipate that pre-service training will train me to utilize the skills I possess in ways that will be most effective in my future position in Kazakhstan.

How you think Peace Corps service will influence your personal and professional aspirations after your service ends.

I know that the effect my Peace Corps service will have on my personal and professional life will be vast. I believe my Peace Corps service will challenge my current thoughts on the world outside of the United States. I am sure that I will gain a greater understanding of myself including my limitations and abilities. Peace Corps will push me beyond my general comfort level and test my strength as an individual. I know that I will return to the states with a greater appreciation for family and friends and small comforts that may now go unnoticed.
Professionally, my Peace Corps service will give me an undoubted advantage in an English as a Second language classroom, whether it is here in the United States or abroad. Spending time working with other teachers and focusing on useful strategies in the classroom will certainly cause me to reevaluate my classroom strategies. The international experience of living in Kazakhstan and learning a second language will give me an advantage in being able to more closely relate to the students in my classroom. No matter what direction my professional endeavors take me, the life skills I will develop in my Peace Corps service will transfer and apply. I am certain that I will possess more confidence in my professional skills and my ability to accomplish even the most arduous task.

and that's all folks.

i have accepted the position in kazakhstan. i put more details about kazakhstan and my assignment under the tabs at the top of the page.

the question of the hour has been 'how do you feel'? i feel a lot of things at the moment. i am mainly excited about this absolutely superb opportunity. of course there is a hint of sadness at leaving my awesome family and friends. i know that particular feeling is one that i will feel much stronger the closer march, 9th gets. right now though, i am feeling a whole lot of overwhelmed.

i have so much information to process and paperwork to fill out and send in. i also have my updated resume and aspiration statement to send in. unfortunately, i still have a major commitment to my classes and work. as much as i would love to plop down on my couch, work on a packing list, and practice russian, i still have plenty o' stuff to get done.

i also have a lot of people to tell about pc. i kept it all on the down low because i didn't want to say anything and then not get invited, but now i have so many people to tell that had no clue i even applied.

this is so exciting and exhausting and i still have quite a while until staging.

let the countdown begin,