Thursday, December 9, 2010

ridin the waves.

i have completely neglected this blog. now that the semester is winding down i figure i owe everyone an update.

first of all, getting an application status update after being invited=scary. that excited feeling no longer accompanies those 5 a.m. emails. my application status update let me know that i have a dental hold. apparently my dental clearance is only good until march 5th & i'm supposed to leave march 9th (actually the OMS letter said march 8th, but i'm trying not to get too hung up on the discrepancy). so now i am just waiting on obama's health reform to put me back on mommy and daddy's insurance. blue cross blue shield says that will be jan. 1. cutting it close? maybe, but i def. can't afford those dental x-rays on my part-time retail paycheck =)

in other news, i filled out & sent my visa application along with my passport. i never heard whether they got that or not. i probs should put that on my list of things to check on. i read everything included in that blue invitation kit & i also started learning russian. i'm pretty sure that's how the nightmares started. in the latest nightmare i landed in almaty alone with just my sister's kitten. i couldn't find my bags & i was wandering around in the freezing cold. there were people inside stores, but i couldn't go in & ask for directions because i had the cat. i was worried the whole time about mr. bingley (that's our cat) freezing his little white tail off. i finally found my bag, but it was almost completely empty. i went to tell the baggage claim people, but i didn't know how to say anything but cat in russian. [that is actually true. for some reason cat is the only word that is sticking with me. & apples. which is good because i am allergic to apples and kazakhstan is the birthplace of apples.]

so i think all the nightmares attributed to the fact that last week i woke up & couldn't help but think "what the heck are you doing?" i spent the entire week trying to put my finger on what it was that had originally drawn me to PC. i applied for PC when i was in my last semester of college. the plan had been to go after graduation, get back by the time i was 23 & then start doing more grown-up things. i am now 23. my application was put on hold, and then i withdrew it for the master's international program, & now i am 23 and leaving for PC. & when i get back i will be 26 and doing all sorts of 21-23 year old things. one of the major changes for me was coming home and falling in love all over again with my ex-bf. and now i am leaving him for 27 months when i know that if i stayed i would be getting married in the next 27 months instead. that's a big thing that i have admitted to very few people.

so i was feeling very blue about the whole PC thing. i know for a fact that celebrating thanksgiving and realizing it would be last with family for a while played a direct role in my second-guessing. i read & re-read my favorite PC blogs. normally they get me excited, but for some reason it wasn't working. so i decided to go shopping. shopping is my cure-all. i was rummagging through the jewelry at the thrift store while my sister was checking out when i saw this keychain:

anyone who knows me knows that i love all things pink, artsy, & with a hippy flare. i immediately grabbed it & hurried to give it to my sister before she finished checking out. you will never believe what was on the back:

that's right. that there is the kazakhstan flag with kazakhstan written above it. almost instantly i felt like sobbing and laughing. & i have been back on the PC bandwagon since. for those of you that are now questioning my sanity or desire to actually go overseas: 27 months is a loooong time. kazakhstan is coooooold. and the insane thing would be not to think seriously about this decision before i leave my loved ones behind.

on that note... enjoying the high,


  1. Emily, all your feelings are totally natural and it wouldn't be real if you weren't feeling them! Believe me though when I say despite the highs and the lows of being away with PC you will NEVER regret it :) And 26 is not too old to still have a life when you get back!!!

  2. Emily, hi! My name is Crystal and I have been assigned to Kazakhstan as well.So, i guess we will meet on March 9th! I would love to talk to you more about everything! I'm starting to get a little nervous as the clock winds down as well. You can reach me at if you're interested in chatting!

    good luck!